Category Archives: Self Care

June 7, 2014

Cooking Up a Dose of Relaxation

By JL
Cooking Up Sweet Succor for My Spirit

Bubble, Bubble – No More Toils or Troubles

I have to admit, I’ve been feeling stressed the past few months. The late spring and sudden summer, with yard and garden chores backed up, the long list of home projects never getting shorter despite the number tackled, and taking on a few new writing gigs have compounded to set me on edge. I want to simplify my life, not complicate it.

Long before bucket lists became the buzz, I had a retirement list. A mental bullet list of things I was going to do when I had more leisure time and while I was still able.

  • Learn to paint
  • Learn to play an instrument
  • Learn to quilt
  • Write a book
  • Read more books
  • Put all my photos into albums

Yeah, right, like that last one is ever going to happen. And now I can add organizing all the images on my computer into file folders that make some kind of sense.

The bump in this stretch of my mid-life path is that my husband is retired; I am not. I have a tendency to follow detours into his realm. I find myself remembering that working from home does not mean I am not working. I still have client projects, I still have deadlines, I still have to work – even if it is part-time and even if it is on my schedule.

I could quit it all. I could be just as retired as he is (even if my official retirement age is more than a decade away). In all truth, I have made a (halfhearted) attempt at retirement. But there is always some project that is too tempting, some client whose enthusiasm is contagious and the next thing I know I’m spinning back into the work vortex.

Jump starting a few of my retirement list dreams has only added to my conundrum of too much to do with too little time to do it. When I’m stretching myself thinner than a diet wafer cookie, I turn into that woman with one nerve left and everybody is getting on it. That’s when I know I need to step away from the computer, step away from the house and step away from the retired husband.

Violet Blossoms from the MAD Goddess's Garden

Violet Blossoms from the MAD Goddess’s Garden

Today I closed my eyes to all that needed to be done, and opened them to what wanted to be done. I spent over an hour picking violets instead of pulling weeds from the garden. I spent nearly as much time plucking the petals from the stems, rather than picking last fall’s dry leaves from my flower beds, even though perennials are struggling to push through. Instead of scrubbing the kitchen floor, I stirred up a sticky mess and dirtied a sink full of dishes. Instead of putting the laundry away, I put up four jars of the loveliest jelly I have ever seen – though the delicate pink of rose petal jelly is a worthy rival.

Bottled Sunshine

Bottled Sunshine

It took me the better part of the day to make just a few small jars of this ambrosia. It was work – back breaking work stooping and bending to pick hundreds of violets. It was sweaty work sterilizing jars in boiling water and standing over a hot stove, stirring the mixture while it bubbled in the pan. But a magical thing happened – my stress just melted away as the day went on.

Any time that I can spend outside in the garden and under the bright summer sun, any opportunity to be immersed in nature, is a healing balm to me. Add the alchemy of taking the gifts nature offers and transforming them, creating something of beauty – whether a lovely pastel jelly, an herb infused oil, a jar of pickles or a pot of garden vegetable soup  – and I am in my zone.

Chances are I may have to repeat the cooking and bottling if the jelly doesn’t set. I’ve done this before. Working with ingredients that have no natural pectin is always a gamble and I’ve learned that violet or rose petal syrup is still just as beautiful and tastes delicious over ice cream or pancakes, or as a sweetener in my tea.

It’s all good.

 

2 Comments | posted in Joie de Vivre, Self Care, WILDCRAFTING

April 24, 2014

Traveling The Road of Good Intentions

By JL

Spring has sprung and it’s been a hard cold winter baby. But this is the season of new beginnings, a new season of growth, flowing into summer.

Unfortunately for me, I’ve been going with the flow and growing in all the wrong ways these the past few months. I took the wandering gypsy wagon on the road, pointed south and escaped the worst winter had to offer, for a few months at least. I tried telling myself that I was going to start some new habits. I was going to use my two months of leisurely snowbird living to bike, swim and eat a lot of salads. I ditched the cold winds of winter and with them, my couch potato tendencies. I planned to come home ten pounds lighter.

In fact, I came home packing a few more saddlebags than I’d left with. What the heck? Where did I go wrong?

Talking about adopting new habits is exciting and hopeful, and there is a powerful feeling that comes with the declaration to kick an old pattern to the curb. But when considering changing routines and habits, actually exchanging old habits for new, suddenly there is the implication of hard work, not to mention the gloomy possibility of not succeeding.

I’d like to blame my middle age body that finds new and more sadistic ways to spirit my youth away from me. While it’s true that middle-age-spread is part of the equation, the ultimate undoing of my grand plans was my utter lack of a good plan to begin with. I missed one very important step. Replacing what I was taking away with something not only better for me or more condusive to my goal, but equal in the satisfaction factor.

I’m sure my body is very grateful for the invigorating physical activity, but that doesn’t change the fact that both my body and mind missed the pleasures of lounging on a soft surface, preferably in the sun, reading a good book. Or snuggling up in a down quilt on a cool night, watching a good movie, whiling the hours away with my cat purring beside me. I still craved that pleasure. My mistake was not knowing ahead of time what I would replace it with, and so I mindlessly over indulged in food — glorious food, and drink.

Hey, don’t judge. There’s a lot of pleasure to be had in good regional cuisine and libations. But even with the physical activity I added, I was packing on more calories than I was burning off. I’m thinking now that a better plan would have included a few hour long massages and frequent regular steam saunas whilst drinking lots and lots of water. Both would be ample enough reward to motivate me to steer clear of the extra helpings.

Depending on which guru of change you listen to, it can take 21, or 30, or 45, or 60, or even 61 days (really – one more day is going to make that much difference?), to form a new habit. Much of it depends on what the new habit is and whether or not it’s replacing an old habit.  Habits are patterns, they are like grooves in a record and the longer you’ve been playing the same old tune, the deeper the groove. It’s far easier to slip back into old patterns, than it is to stay the course of new ones. Such is human nature.

So it’s back to the drawing board for me, with deference to the middle-aged-metabolism-slow-down and a plan that will offer some measure of reward that doesn’t come by the cupful.

In this season of renewal are you considering making some changes in your life?  Check out my four step plan of Self C.A.R.E for making change that lasts and enriching your mid-life years.

*For those who have joined the Dark Moon Lodge journey, click through for newly posted creative journaling prompts. Remember the password is “darkmoon”.

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January 26, 2014

Finding Self Through The Creative Muse

By JL

cre-ate ~ 1. To cause to come into being. 2. Pursue a creative activity; be engaged in a creative activity.

“As we were manifested at the will of the Creator, we too are innately driven to recreate in our own image, whether by bringing children into the world, creating visual, written or musical art, or simply infusing our life and work with personal energy.” ~ The Goddess Muse

It is said that true happiness if found within and to go looking for it outside of yourself is an exercise in futility. But what does that mean?  Some people seem to chase after things in their pursuit of happiness – experiences, possessions, relationships – yet never find that contentment they seek. Others who describe themselves as happy with their lives, may or may not have similar experiences and situations; they may even have quite a bit less, but still experience life as happy individuals. How can that be?

Our very essence is to create. It is our reason for being. All of the millions of thoughts we have in a lifetime are a creation of our brain, unique to each individual. Our brain’s very function is to produce thought; to cause thought to come into being. Everything we do throughout our entire lifetime is the result of first being a thought. Even if it is the most knee-jerk, spur of the moment, crisis situation reaction – it is still comes into being first as a thought, and then becomes an action. 

I believe that happiness, contentment, and fulfillment (call it what you like) comes from using your energy to create the life you truly desire – whatever that may be. Our ability to create holds the power to bring us that which me most desire.

I believe that harnessing intentional creativity is the key to happiness. Whether  you paint, sing, write build, garden, cook, teach, preach or listen . . . you are creating. The trick is to be aware that you create every moment of your life.

So while it may look like happiness manifests externally, by achieving the things we do or acquiring the things we have, happiness in fact only happens when that which me manifest externally resonates with our internal desires. We’re all creating our happiness externally – outside of ourselves. Those who don’t get it (literally) have either failed to discern what truly makes them happy, or they know and are denying innermost desires – mostly likely out of fear.

To paraphrase Shakespeare, “To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as night the day, thou canst not then be other than happy.”

To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.

William Shakespeare

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/w/williamsha106104.html#lsVY7M3yC4FkVZtG.99

Yesterday, with the cold and blowing winds rattling against my window panes and temperatures plummeting well below zero, I cocooned myself in my kitchen and cooked up an arsenal of goodness to ward off winter chills; chicken soup, elderberry syrup, cranberry and rowan tonic. It all left me feeling very warm, satisfied with a job well done, and quite happy, despite the weather. All in all, a good day.

What makes you happy?  Knowing the answer is the first step in manifesting your life, your way . . . with Purpose, Passion and Pizzazz!

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