Category Archives: Beauty and Image

January 3, 2010

By JL

Some of you might notice that I run Google AD Sense on this blog. It’s making me fabulously wealthy – NOT! Of course, one can’t disparage Google for that. I think it has more to do with my outstanding number of followers – more specifically, the lack thereof.

My college daughter recently posted an installment on the blog she started as a class assignment for critical writing. She didn’t waste any words in pointing out that the million or so bloggers looking for their fifteen-minutes of fame would do better to stop writing what they think people want to hear, and instead write their passionate, unvarnished, maybe even ugly, truth.

So, for now, I won’t worry about followers or fans, I’ll just try to write closer to the bone of my truth (not always easy when I know the whole fam damily is reading – oh well, sucks to be them.)

Back to Ad Sense. The idea is, that based on the blog post content, random ads for products and services that should interest my readers will display. Clicks on the ads accumulate cents for me (cents, Ad Sense, get it?).

Let me just say that I never did this hoping to make money.

Well, okay, I hoped that maybe I’d make some money from it, but I never really thought I would. Looks like I was right about that.

Anyway, I recently noticed a trend in the ads that are displaying. Weight loss products would be the nice thing to say, but these are blatant LOOSE BELLY FAT ads. Then there are the sales pitches for anti wrinkle creams and cosmetic dermatology.

One installment netted me an ad for Goddess Dresses. Now that’s what I’m talking about! Just one nagging little detail though – it was on a post that contained a picture of my middle daughter and two of her diva friends at their high school prom. Hhmmm.

Where are the ads for cruises to the Greek Isles? How about luxury health spas, Jaguar sedans and little blue boxes from Tiffany’s?

What on earth did I write that netted me the ads for a popular piney-scented cleaning solution and another well known germ destroying spray. Yikes!

Okay, maybe I understand the ad for a marriage counselor practicing in my neighboring state. I do rant about the institution of marriage now and again. But am I to glean from this situation that some powers that be, sitting on their sweat-pants clad butts in ergonomically correct chairs at Google headquarters, are presuming that my readers are an unhappy bunch of, germaphobic, desperate housewives who shop
for their daughters prom dresses in the mini-diva, designer department?

Goddess! How depressing is that?

Here I was thinking that my audience was made up of strong, confident, self assured women setting their worlds on fire and dancing across their bridges one step ahead of the flames.

I apologize, dear, loyal (few) readers. I’ll try, in future, to follow my daughter’s advice and give you a little something to set it off.

. . . . . mid

GET A ^ LIFE at MAD Goddess

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December 24, 2009

THE DEVIL MADE ME GET FAT.

By JL

I haven’t done any holiday baking yet, ’cause – you know . . .in our midlife and beyond house, sugar, butter,chocolate and taste have all taken on a four letter pseudonym – EVIL.

Did you ever notice the connection between evil and devil (or good and God for that matter? Think about it.).

Anyway, these things are evil in our house, the devil incarnate that makes my hips blossom and fills my hubbie’s already clogged arteries with more plaque. They are taboo, forbidden, off limits . . .

. . . tantalizing little temptations promising to delight my taste buds and satisfy my tummy in a way that indulgences of the non-food variety could never do.

Oops. Sorry.

But it’s the holiday’s right? We need to indulge a little. If my husband croaks any time soon, I guess you can blame me for taking a week or so off from my food-police duties.

I’m beginning to get an idea of how Eve felt, branded throughout time as the inadequate mate who fed her hubby the wrong thing and cast him into abject misery outside his happy little life in the garden. Uh, he heard the Word too. Think he might have been capable of saying, “No thank you, Eve. I’ll pass on the apples.”

This afternoon, I’m whipping up some of my Aunt Mug’s (Margaret if you must) Toffee Squares. Auntie Mugs was a Buxom Babe.

A few days ago I started contemplating the word buxom. While it technically refers to a womanly part of the anatomy that lies above the waist, I believe it’s general implication is of a shapely women in the Reubanesque style. Let’s face it, for the most part, assuming nature is the underlying architect, if the womanly figure is full up top then chances are good she’s shapely at the belly and hips as well.

What’s not to love about that?

(FYI, Mattel leveled a “cease and desit order against that ad campaign)

Or this?

Finally, a wonder woman archetype to which I can live up – uhm, out? (I didn’t find any information of Marvel Comics requesting a cease and desist on this one.)

And since I’ll be parking my buxomness in Florida soon, for a whole month of decadent deck lounging . . .

how about this?
I like her, she reminds me a lot of the Queen of Cups card in my Tarot deck.
(click on the pic to see more beautiful, one of a kind creations at the artist’s website)

This Goddess is growing weary of the pursuit of perfection to be had in a size 8 mini skirt. I think for the new year, I’ll resolve to embrace by rubenesqueness (I made that derivation up. I like the way it sounds) and free the buxom babe I am meant to be.

Now, that’s a plan I can wrap my mind around, if not my arms.

. . . . . . mid

GET A ^ LIFE at MAD Goddess

1 Comment | posted in Beauty and Image

December 22, 2009

MAKING MY LIST AND CHECKING IT TWICE

By JL

Truthfully, I don’t have to check this list twice. The only name on it is mine and I know I’ve been a good girl all year long.

Furthermore, I’m not counting on some old fat guy with a white beard to navigate a sleigh full of treasures to me, no matter how jolly he is. I’m letting my fingers travel over the keyboard to some of my favorite shopping haunts – the places that carry all the things a Mad Goddess woman like me could dream of.

Every Goddess needs a good pair of ruby red slippers and these are my choice. Don’t be jealous, just keystroke over to pyramidcollection.com and snatch up a pair for yourself.

While you’re at it, you might want to wander over to uncommongoods.com for this way out shoe rack – high heels easily accommodated.

This seemed like a good hat to add to my collection.

Not too showy, neutral colors. I think I could wear it for everyday trips to the village market. No sense now in trying to convince the locals that I’m not a tad eccentric – but that’s a story for another time.

For chilly nights by the fire, this cozy cuddler will keep me toasty warm and, unlike my prissy pure bread feline companions, it won’t shed.

The hat, rose throw and the sign below can all be had from victoriantradingco.com.

Don’t ask me why, but I’ve developed a desire to label my bathroom door. I’ve bypassed many a “powder room” plaques and now I now why. This beauty is far more elegant.

And while we’re on the subject of signs, this little gem from pyramidcollection.com was a must have been made for me. A Goddess has to have somebody’s feet at which to lay the blame.

I can’t get enough sparkling, dangly ornaments to hang from my ears. These little gems are just quirky enough to suit me.

Made from recycled depression glass, get them while they last at uncommongoods.com

While there, you might want a sign like this one, stating that the Supergirl cape is in the laundry. I know that’s where mine is.

Of course, while I’m waiting for the cape to come out shiny clean and dry, I can drape this orchid ostrich feather boa from kirksfolllystore.com around my shoulders . . .